My Life

A Little Update…..

For those new to my blog, this is an update from my car accident post HERE. The other updates can be found HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE , HERE and HERE.

Today I’m taking a break from all things crafty here on the blog and giving a long overdue health update. I’ve been receiving several emails asking how I’m coping and how things are on the health front, so I figured it was time to update you all with a post.

It’s been 603 days since that dreaded day….the day I was in my car accident and my life drastically changed. Gone are the days of me being a normal twenty-something year old and now I’m facing a time in my life where each day is uncertain if I’ll feel good or not. Some may be questioning if I have been to the doctor to see why things are still unknown. The answer is YES. I’ve gone to so many doctors, I can’t even remember the number anymore. Have I had tests done? YES. Again, the number of tests, blood work, etc., that has been done is beyond my recollection. How do I feel about all of this? In a word: FRUSTRATED.

Many of you see me as upbeat, happy and having a cheery deposition. While I would like to keep that impression alive, I would be lying if I said I didn’t get discouraged that I haven’t been able to lead a normal life since the accident. Going from being the girl who had at least 4-5 things going on weekly, on top of work, to having absolutely nothing on the calendar and working when I can, my life has made a 180 degree turn.

With a drastic change in life, I found myself in a deep, dark depression that I couldn’t seem to get out of. I can’t even begin to tell you how many days I had where I wondered why God let me make it through the accident. While the days of severe (and almost unbearable) pain are gone, I’m still reminded that my life isn’t what it used to be. Rarely am I able to drive further than a few miles from my house, standing in grocery stores for longer than 10 minutes is almost impossible and going to movies isn’t something I’m able to do anymore (Did you know it’s possible for your senses to get enhanced after something traumatic? I didn’t, until now either).

With so many dark, dark days and very few answers, I felt worthless. defeated and angry. I know for certain that during those days, MANY family members, friends and maybe even some blog readers were praying for me. One day, I wasn’t so discouraged and while it may have helped that I had some coffee in me, I know that God just wrapped His arms around me. I felt joy- something I hadn’t felt in ages. I also felt like I needed to DO something with myself.

Enter in the Pretty Pink Posh Shop…. One day in October 2013, I thought maybe I should pursue my dream of opening my own business. If only you could hear the inner battles I had in this brain of mine. The practical side of me was thinking this was a horrible idea (since many days I was still in bed), but then the crazy, spontaneous side of me said I should just give it a whirl. I did some research on what it would take to become a business and from there things snowballed into a launch.

So now that I actually have my business, how are things going on the health front? Well, I still have to take things day by day. Some days I feel unstoppable and almost feel like I have my old energy levels back. Then there are other days when I feel pretty crummy, bound to my bed and am reminded that I am still facing health issues and need to not push myself so hard.

What have I found to be true in all of this? My story is far from over. God has amazed me in how a tragic situation could turn into something beautiful. The people I have been able to reach out to, help and correspond with because of my story is beyond amazing. I have been able to relate with people with chronic pain, physical issues and other situations that I wouldn’t have been able to had I not been in this accident. Since I had to slow down and was home bound, this prompted the start of my business. Goodness knows I was far too busy before the accident to even think about this possibility. It’s also been neat to see how my business has been able to touch others and also inspired people in many different ways. Something HORRIBLE turned into something GOOD!

Speaking of good….I recently was interviewed for a crafting podcast and was able to share some of this story there. I also share some other tidbits of info- I’d love for you to listen in as I do a mini interview with Renee! Well, that’s going to do it for this update post. I want to give say a GIANT thank you to those who continue to keep me in your thoughts and prayers, the lovely readers and customers who send cards and gifts and those of you who check in on me. I truly wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for you all. I’m so very thankful for YOU, my wonderful readers and blog friends.

Thanks for spending some time with me today!

My Life

A Look Back at 2013

It feels like it just a moment ago when I typed up my review post last year. As I went to look back on that post, it was so fun to see where I’ve come in the last year, my card making evolving and then seeing my dream of opening my own shop become a reality. So many changes in what seems to be the blink of an eye. 2013

Let’s start by reviewing some of my personal posts from this year. Last April I switched from a craft blog into a blog that encompasses my crafts, but also tidbits of my personal life. While it’s still a little weird to share some deep and personal things, it’s also been so neat to look back on the things I’ve come through, along with hearing how my stories impact YOUR lives. Here’s some of the most popular ones from 2013….

Laughing In The Moments

Finding Joy In The Journey

In The Quiet….

What If….

Are You Beautiful?

True Friends

Worrying Will Never Change the Outcome

Crafty Creations

It’s hard to do a review post without going back and sharing some of my projects from this past year. It probably goes without saying, but most of the most popular posts this year were ones featuring sequins. Oh the beauty of Pinterest and people pinning items galore! *wink*

Click on the card photos to visit the original blog posts.

WHAT’S COMING IN 2014

With the ending of the 10 Minute Craft Dash this week, one would think I would take a minute to pause and enjoy some extra downtime. Truth be told, I’m jumping head first into another project that is both exciting and nerve wrecking. *insert both squeals of joy and fear* I’m currently focusing on the Pretty Pink Posh Shop and on Friday, I’ll be announcing the very first design team. I have several new products coming and soon I’ll also have my very own shopping cart! I’ve been doing lots of research and working on things behind-the-scenes, but I’m hoping within a few weeks, it’ll be up and running!

What does that mean for you, my readers? I’m still planning on crafting and blogging- these are my passions and no matter how busy I get, I’ll always still manage to find time to blog. (Even if it’s only once a week) I’m also hoping that as my shop grows and word of it spreads, I can expand my product line even more. I have so many ideas of products I want to carry…. I know that my dream of opening my own shop wouldn’t have come true without the following of my loyal craft friends and readers. The friendships I have made through the blog have been such a blessing- I can’t wait to make even more in the new year!

Wishing you all a very blessed 2014.

My Life

Laughing In The Moments

I never would have imagined I would be 26 and riding in an automated shopping cart. Goodness, those were for people who were either old, handicapped, pregnant or had special circumstances. For someone who was overly cautious not to hurt themselves, active and healthy and having no prospects of a husband or starting a family in sight, to THIS….

laughing It’s not a secret I’ve been having a tough physically journey since the accident. I’ve gotten some answers, but new issues arise and it seems like life will never return back to the way it was. You know, “normal”. Being able to hop in the car and drive to wherever I needed to go, getting up at a regular morning hour and be able to work a full day, shopping and standing at the grocery store or mall. The little everyday things that most everyone takes for granted, those are the things I long to do.

Recently, I’ve had a few trips to the store where I learned that my body isn’t letting me stand past 5-10 minutes. For a while, I was stand for up to 20 minutes or so and could keep on walking, but that isn’t the case any more. A recent shopping trip proved that now my threshold is 5 minutes, if that. There’s something about that position that gets me super light-headed, which prompts dizziness and the feeling like I’m going to faint. It’s not at all pleasant and has left me not wanting to go anywhere.

As we all know, Christmas is right around the corner and I’m so far behind on everything, it’s almost comical. I’ve been able to do online shopping, but I learned that getting wrapping paper online can either be 1) super expensive or 2) impossible (as in, it’s not available). For a girl that likes to make presents pretty and wanting to handpick her own wrapping paper, this was going to be an obstacle. (Dare I say that I almost succumbed to using Valentine wrapping paper?!)

My sister came over yesterday and we made a surprise trip to visit a friend. Since that went without incident, she offered to take me to Target to get the items I needed. After talking about our “game plan” (aka: how I could get to the back of the store), she said I should use an automated cart. My initial thought: what would people think of me?

One would think with all that I’ve had to deal with these last 16 months, I would have learned to swallow my pride easily months ago. It’s something I’m working on and (slowly) succeeding at.

After prodding from my sister and her being more than willing to help me get items, I can now say that we maneuvered the store, I FINALLY got to the back of Target to get the items I needed and many items are now crossed off the shopping list. I have a new sense of admiration for those who have to use those automated carts at stores regularly. People constantly dash in front of them, the turn radius is atrocious (yes, I did run into one shelf), you get strange looks often AND reversing leads to an annoying beep, beep, beep noise….

During this memorable shopping trip, I couldn’t help but laugh many times. I know I looked silly, this situation is less than ideal, but the fact that I could laugh through it, is proof that change is happening inside of me. Not to mention, my pride is being broken piece by piece, I’m learning to appreciate the small things and I’m learning what true friendship really means. I’m not sure if I would have learned these lessons had the accident not happened… friends, it’s all about finding joy in the journey and laughing in the moments.

I’d love to know, what circumstance or situation did you last laugh about?

My Life

Finding Joy In The Journey

Joy. It’s a simple three-letter word and yet sometimes it’s one of the hardest emotions to show. This little word has been on my heart for a few weeks now but I kept putting off bringing it to the blog. Why? Quite honestly, because I haven’t felt all that joyful recently.

If you missed my previous posts about my car accident and updates, find them HERE, HERE and the latest update HERE

As my regular readers know, I was in a car accident 14 months ago. That one moment, that one day in August 2013, changed my life and turned my life upside down. I went from being a girl who had a full social life, a bright future, dreams and goals that went on for days, to being someone I barely recognize internally. The person who had plans just about every single weekend, the world at her fingertips, someone in the “prime” of her life suddenly was fighting for the will to live on a daily (sometimes hourly) basis. Physical pain took on new life, the days of “normal” sleeping hours went from 6 to 18, the amount of doctor visits in just three months was more than most people go in 10 years. I can’t tell you that during these moments I had joy, because that would be a flat-out lie.

The first few days and weeks after my accident, I was grateful to be alive. That in itself was and is a miracle. However, soon after, I was wishing I hadn’t made it. The amount of physical pain I was dealing with was excruciating. The months and months of not having ANY answers was difficult mentally and emotionally. Spiritually, it’s been one battle after another and I felt like I had nothing left worthwhile to offer the world. Heck, I couldn’t even stand for 5- 10 minutes. What was the point in life anymore?

These last 14 months have been a long journey. I’m sad to say, that during this time, more often than not I haven’t had joy. I was angry that God would allow this to happen. I battle often with thoughts of discouragement and wondering if I’ll ever find someone who will love me and be able to handle the issues I face. In fact, I often still struggle with the fact that I can’t do things most can do on a daily basis.

Recently Jesus has tugged at my heart and I had a mental change (no doubt to the hundreds of prayers on my behalf). I wanted to stop thinking about everything I couldn’t do and be grateful for the things I COULD do. I could still craft occasionally. I could still blog occasionally. I could still work occasionally. There are days when I almost feel normal and have energy….THOSE are my favorite. Finding joy in these things have made a difference in my outlook. Taking captive the days when I do have energy carries me through the days when I can’t work or get out of bed. Finding joy in the little things (that might normally get taken for granted) has a way of changing your outlook on things.

During this whole journey, I have continued to blog and share life when I was able to. Who knew that in THESE moments, the times when I opened my “book” and shared a few pages, these would be the moments that bonded you all to me. Sharing my journey (and pain) has been humbling and yet God has been able to use it to bring joy. The emails and comments I have received when I have opened my life to you, the prayers and encouragement, the letters and gifts I have received, those things have brought me joy.

Is it easy? No. Does it take practice? Yes. Am I a pro at it? No. Do I strive to find joy in at least one thing daily? Yes.

I know many of you are going through difficult times right now. I encourage and challenge you to find JOY in at least one thing daily. It can be big or little, take that thing captive and hold onto it.

We are all on a journey and it’s easy to get discouraged, frustrated or even angry at the one we are on. Let’s find JOY in the journey we are currently on….you just never know where it could take you.

My Life

In the Quiet….

It’s been quite a while since I’ve done a heartfelt and personal post. I haven’t forgotten about them, it’s just that time has slipped away and I didn’t want to give just a quick, half-hearted one. These posts are little pieces of my heart, a closer look into my personal life and honestly, sometimes there are tears that come from writing them.

It’s no secret that I’m a fan of social media. In fact, in the past I’ve claimed to be an addict of it. Whether it be Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, I’m on them all. Truth be told, I’m also on all of them for work. That’s EIGHT different social media places that I’m on almost daily, sometimes even simultaneously.

Recently, I have felt like I’m constantly “plugged in” and these places were no longer places of joy. While I love the instantaneous rotation of news these sites bring, I almost felt like my life revolved around them and it was getting to be suffocating.

With my health issues being where they’re at {because of my car accident: story HERE, latest update HERE}, I have spent a LOT of time in bed and needless to say, my phone is always right next to me. I was getting notification after notification about this person tweeting, so and so posting something new on Facebook, notifications that items of mine were being repinned, dozens of people liking photos on Instagram…. Don’t get me wrong, I DO love all of these things. I really, really do. However, it felt like they were taking over my life and every time I would look at my phone, it was blowing up with social media news.

I needed a break.

I recently changed settings on my phone so not everything shows up. I took somethings off my phone completely. I don’t carry my phone everywhere anymore. {If you text me and don’t get a response quickly, this is why}

Want to know how things have changed? I don’t feel so suffocated with news anymore. I can enjoy the moments with family and friends, without having my phone always in my hand. I can CHOOSE when I want to be connected and not have it always right there on my phone the second I turn it on. It’s honestly so freeing.

I have found in the moments of quiet {or rather not being plugged in}, I can actually think without distractions. I can live in the moment and not live in the moments of everyone else.

Has anyone else felt like they are always plugged in? I would love to hear your thoughts on social media and the pros and/or cons you have with it. I would even challenge you to change some settings on your phone, or put time restrictions on them, and get a new take on life. You might initially be scared at how quiet things can get, but it gets easier, I promise.

Let’s start living in the moment more often. I’m doing it, won’t you join me?

*the amazing photo used was taken by my sister in Japan.

My Life

Unexpected Blessings

I am still constantly amazed at the things that have happened through my blog. Encouragement has been given, smiles {and tears} have ensued, inspiration has flown freely and lasting friendships have been made. I never dreamed that when I started this blog, it would grow to be where it is today or that I would build/ develop such amazing bonds with my readers. The title of this post really does say it all….

Last week, after a particularly rough week of recovering from a concussion and the craziness of trying to work in the midst of it, I was feeling downright exhausted and dare I say, defeated. In the past, I considered myself to be a fighter in life, but with blow after blow from the accident, my thoughts on this have started to dwindle. What started out to be a ignited fire to figure out what was wrong with me and get to the root has slowly progressed to frustration, disappointment and many other feelings. Don’t get me wrong, we are still actively trying to find out what is wrong with me, but I think I’m a little more realistic in my hopes and mentally telling myself I may need to learn to live life like this.

It’s in these moments of discouragement, frustration and tears, God has a way of bringing sunshine into my darkest days. It could be as small as having my younger brother say he prays for me daily {I nearly bawled when he told me this} to a friend sending an encouraging text or getting REAL mail in the mailbox. Then there are the moments when you get bigger rays of sunshine and your best friend makes you dinner, you receive an abundance of birthday flowers from different people, an unexpected monetary gift to help with medical bills is given, or you have a friend unexpectedly drive out to your house with flowers and a card*. All of these things have happened this last week and I cannot even begin to say how my heart has swelled with joy, love and thankfulness.

I won’t say that these things happen to me often, but I will say that if we look {and sometimes we REALLY need to look}, there are blessings that happen all around us everyday. For example, today my dad offered to cook up some dinner for me. Is this a small thing? Yes. However, it’s a blessing and now I have leftovers for lunch tomorrow. Let’s see…another blessing that happened today….the Starbucks barista was super cheery when I got my coffee this morning and definitely helped kickstart the day off in a happy way. It’s little things like this that can sometimes go overlooked that I’m learning {and trying to make a conscious effort} to take notice of and be grateful for.

Sweet friends, what unexpected blessings are you thankful for this week? It can be something small or large, I would love to hear about them and rejoice in your blessings with you! Let’s make an effort to take notice of the blessings around us!

*The picture in the graphic featured is with my dear, sweet friend, Robyn. We had gone to church together for years and years but our paths never crossed. After we both started going to different churches, she started following my blog and has been such an amazing source of encouragement, tips on health information and a prayer warrior. So blessed by this gem!

My Life

What If…..

Have any of you gone through a stage in your life when it feel likes you’re either drugged up or you’re in a dream? In either case, you aren’t in a complete state of consciousness- almost feeling like you’re in a daze. Welcome to the last 288 days of my life {story here, latest update here}.

I’ve posted updates here and there during this craziness that has been my life. Honestly, I feel like I’ve been on this giant roller-coaster that has had far too many dips and sharp turns in it. Goodness, I can’t handle them in real life and evidently, I don’t deal with them very well figuratively either. It feels like I’m in the seat and we’re slowing inching up towards the biggest curve and when I think the ride is almost done, something unexpected happens. Everyday I think I’ll wake up and this will all be a dream, but alas, I know this isn’t true.

Late last year, I did an interview with Jenny Simmons, a Christian artist {post here}. She released her debut solo album earlier this year and while I enjoy the whole cd, the song “What Faith’s About” has spoken to my heart ever since I heard it.

What if the days I’m walking into
Are the best of my whole life?

Cause who am I not to be, not to be
Everything that You have called me?
And who am I not to speak, not to speak
To every mountain that’s before me

— small snippets from the song What Faith’s About by Jenny Simmons

There have been so many times I have listened to this song and just burst into tears, tonight being one of them. In my heart of hearts I believe that God DOES have a plan and a purpose in all of this, I truly do. I’m hoping that someday, maybe in the near future, He’ll show it to me and my life can move on from this. My body is exhausted from the pain, the different ailments and then mysterious health issues that have arisen separate from the accident. Emotionally, most of the time I’m a wreck. My thought process, memory, cognitive behavior have all changed and the day-to-day things in life seem to get harder and harder. I’m at the age where I should be enjoying life to the fullest and yet here I am, feeling like I’m on the outside looking in on everyone else living life.

I miss being able to stand up for more than 5 minutes at a time. I miss the days when I felt relatively healthy for at least five days straight. I miss having good posture and not needing to hunch over to make the pain in my back and neck bearable. I miss what it was like to not have to take medications for migraines almost everyday. I miss the moments when I was able to drive wherever I wanted and not have ANY flashbacks and anxiety over driving. I miss having a passion and zest for life. Honestly, this list could go on and on…..

Sweet friends, this is me. Real. There have more breaks here on the blog because I’ve been dealing with the issues above, along with others. My blog is my baby and honestly, if I didn’t have it during all of this, I don’t know how I would have managed to get this far. Many of you have been with me since before the accident happened and I wanted to give you a raw, uncut look into life lately and why I’ve been slower about responding, less “on it” and not posting as often.

If any of you are facing difficult situations, I’m going to encourage you to listen to this song. Then, if you’d like, feel free to leave a comment or send me an email– know that you are not alone. For some reason I felt burdened to just be myself without editing too much and sugar coating things today.

With all of that being said, I AM still hopeful that the days I’m walking into are going to be the best days of my life. I don’t know what that will entail or mean exactly {I’m hoping it will still include me blogging!}, but I’m holding onto hope. I need to.

In closing, remember, you are greatly loved by God, and by me. ♥

My Life

Are you beautiful?

When someone says the word beautiful, what do you think of?

It’s been about a month since I did a more personal, heartfelt post {other than my health update}, so I thought it was time to do another one. I was debating for a while on what I wanted to discuss, and decided I wanted to talk about something that can sometimes be controversial- beauty. However, this isn’t going to be the traditional take on this subject…I’m going a little deeper than the surface this time around.

When I was younger, I would spend hours upon hours trying out different ways to style my hair, do my make-up and put together outfits. During a few of these sessions, my mom would remind me to be beautiful on the inside, but honestly, as a teenager I didn’t take those words of wisdom to heart. I would see all the magazines, movies and tv shows and compare myself to those people. While on the inside, I was holding in resentment, anger, stress, low self-esteem….things that are NOT beautiful on anyone. I was so focused on outside “beauty”, that I failed to work on beautiful on the inside.

You may be wondering what kind of beauty one could have on the inside. There are SO many qualities I could have listed, but that in itself could be its own post. Here’s a short little list I put together:

When you read this list, does this bring to mind some people in your life? I can think of so many of my friends who fits many, if not all, of these qualities. You see, they WORK on their internal beauty and it shines through and even translates into physical beauty. When you see someone that is happy, it changes their whole countenance and even their approach on life. That, dear friends, is beautiful.

During this difficult time in my life, there have been health issues that prevented or made it difficult to look beautiful on the outside. Did this discourage me? Absolutely. Then it occurred to me, maybe during this time I could work on becoming more beautiful on the inside instead. I am most definitely a work in progress, but I hope that as time goes on, the beauty on the inside will start to shine forth and radiate on the outside and hopefully also encourage others to pursue the same kind of beauty!

Are there qualities that I didn’t list that you consider beautiful? I’d love to read them! Are there people in your life that you consider beauties on the inside? Feel free to gush about them! We have one life to live, let’s start showcasing that TRUE BEAUTY comes from the INSIDE!

My Life

Health Update

I’ve been contemplating on whether to do this post for a little while now. For those who don’t know, I was in a car accident back in August that changed my life. {post here} I’ve come out of it a different person and it is reflected in my posts, my outlook on life, just to name a few things. Since then, I’ve posted a few snippets of updated info and then I did a health update {post here} back in November. I haven’t done another real post about it since, mostly because there hadn’t been any major changes and big steps forward.

In the past week, I’ve had a lot of people ask me via email, Twitter and text if things have changed recently. As of this very moment, yes, there have been changes! Actually, a lot of progress has been made in the past week or so. *insert squealing and happy dancing all around*

A few months back, while I was going to the chiropractor/ naturopath, he randomly suggested that I might want to change some of my eating habits, to see if that would help with the severe back pain. We quickly learned that I had digestive issues and my body no longer could handle any sort of MSG products. Uh, for those of you who don’t know, that’s in a LOT of things, especially Asian foods. Oh, and don’t just look for the label to say MSG, it’s disguised under a LOT of names. Lots of research, cutting out of just about every place I used to eat and no longer consuming my favorite “go-to” items, I could tell a difference, but I still wasn’t feeling that great. Time for more experimenting….

Another visit to the doctor and he suggested cutting out all grains {not just wheat items} and processed sugars. I won’t lie, I cried when he said this. My life pretty much revolved around breads, rice, and any sort of sugary drink or treat, how was this going to work?! Honestly, I was in so much pain, I knew I had to at least try this for a little bit. One week in, no changes. Two weeks in, a slight improvement. One month in, I could tell something was changing.

Now the question: what was causing my back to be in pain {after the accident}? Sugar, grains or both? After carefully planning out a day where I could afford to be sick, I ate a couple of Wheat Thins. Just a few triggered something, but then I realized it was dumb because it had both wheat and sugar in it! Another go at something with grains and I learned that was the thing that was inflaming my back. After introducing sugars into my system again, it seems to be okay and doesn’t trigger any major pain.

So……I’ve had to completely cut out all grains, MSG products, all nuts {since my body doesn’t seem to digest oils very well} and this seems to keep my pain level at bay. Granted, it’s not gone completely, but I’m SO grateful for this improvement.

Now the question that I get asked a lot, “Are you back to driving?”

Up until literally six days ago, I was only driving 10-15 minutes away from my house alone. Anything further and I would get panic attacks and flashbacks. I had a few failed attempts at driving further, which resulted in a mental/ emotional breakdown. Why couldn’t I get past this? It had been over seven months since the accident, surely I should be “over it” by now. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn’t seem to shake the fear and anxiety.

Thanks to the suggestion of one particular reader, I looked into talking to someone about my anxiety. I know many would try to hide the fact that they are seeking a counselor, but honestly, this person has helped me so much. Not only have I been able to talk through my fears, she’s been able to show me that some of the things I’m allowing myself to believe are completely untrue. I’ve had two visits with her {I have a third one today} and I can tell I’ve started to change the way I’m thinking of the accident and various situations surrounding it.

So I still haven’t answered if I’m driving alone yet. Well, the last couple of days, I’ve been able to drive 40 minutes away BY MYSELF! This feeling is even greater than when I first got my license! Do I still get nervous? Absolutely. However, as I’m doing it more, I’m getting a little more comfortable and hopefully, I’ll be driving everywhere by myself again!

What happens from here?

Well, we still haven’t figured out how to get the pain to go away completely, so hopefully down the road, that answer will reveal itself. I’m not able to stand for longer than 5-10 minutes at a time without pain shooting up and getting nauseated, which is still a mystery. I’ll still have to continue to eat the way I do, since my body literally won’t allow me to go back without major effects. I’m hoping and praying that as time goes on, I’ll be more comfortable driving and won’t need to have help with transportation anywhere.

Thank you from the very bottom of my heart to those who have checked in on me, sent me cards or gifts to encourage me, or somehow contacted me during this time. My blog has almost been a lifeline, since I wasn’t able to go many places for a long, long time. Your comments, words of encouragement and prayers have {and still do} mean so very much.

Whew! I know this was a super long post and I probably lost a lot of you along the way. However, for those who have been wondering or asking, I hoped this cleared up any questions. If there are any more improvements, or changes, I’ll let you all know! :)

So very grateful for you all……

My Life

True Friends

It’s been almost seven months since my car accident and I’ve learned so much from this experience. Granted, I never wanted to be in this situation, but it’s happened and the only thing I can do is focus on getting better, take the good out of this difficult time and {hopefully} encourage others with the things I’ve learned from it.

Before I continue on, I want to say that this post isn’t me being passive aggressive, “bash” or have a “pity party” for myself. If I’m being honest, I have thought about typing up/publishing this post for months and months now. Every time it reappeared on my blog calendar, I would scribble it out and schedule something else. It’s not exactly an easy topic, or one that will make me many friends. This has been on my heart and I thought I would share it with you.

I’ve always known that hard times reveals your true friends, it’s a fact of life. It’s been quite a while since I faced something truly life changing, or something I would classify as “hard”, but I would definitely say the accident has been major in my life. It’s changed my outlook on health, the things I used to take for granted such as work, driving and even standing, and it’s also changed my thoughts on friends.

You may think the quote above is a bit dramatic, but if you truly think about it, it’s true. When you face a difficult situation, it’s not uncommon for people to step back from your friendship, treat you differently, or possibly even pull away completely. It’s usually not an easy task to “walk” with your friends through valleys- sometimes you just don’t know the words to say, how to react, or you just are uncomfortable with everything. Truth is, it’s during these times where they need a TRUE friend .

Qualities of a true friend:

They check in on you. It can be as simple as a text or email, but these things mean a lot. Trust me. It’s better to text them even a simple “thinking/ praying for you” than letting days, weeks, months go by and not saying anything. You may have a friendship where you don’t have think you have to do these things, but if they’re going through a difficult time, these things mean the world.
They encourage you to get out of the house, even if you don’t want to {occasionally}. It’s so easy to wallow in your grief or pain and start having a pity party for yourself. Sometimes you really do just need to get out for a bit. It’ll make them feel “normal” for a little while.
They are there for you. There may be awkward silences, or moments of crying, but you will remember the times when they were there. It’s amazing how sometimes even just their presence can make a world of difference.
They do everything they can to help you. I personally dislike inconveniencing anyone for anything. I’m the type that does things the hard way so I don’t have to ask anyone for help. Truth of the matter is, everyone needs help at sometime, and usually when you’re going through a rough patch, you need help. Offering to help makes it so much easier than having to ask. {Don’t offer to help if you aren’t willing to actually follow through}
They don’t gossip or share your difficulties with others. Sometimes there are situations where others may ask, or someone needs to step in, but no one likes their “dirty laundry” or issues out there for anyone and everyone to know. Be discerning.
They surprise you with things you enjoy. It doesn’t have to be big {or even often}, but a small gift card, a little trinket, a book, a drink or meal…those things can really brighten someone’s day.

I could keep going, but these are the things that have meant the MOST to me during these last eight months. I’m not going to pretend, I honestly am surprised that some people who I THOUGHT were close friends haven’t contacted me once, or some have stopped checking in altogether. Yes, the accident is in the past and I am slowly recovering, but still it’s nice to know that they care, even just a little bit.

I don’t want a pity party, I promise. I guess I just have learned who TRULY are my close friends during this time. Have some actions {or lack thereof} changed my friendships with some people now or in the past? Absolutely.

There WILL be some people who God has put in your life for just a season. It’s true, some people will walk through life with you for a few months, or years, and then the friendship fades. Honestly, sometimes this can be a good thing. Who really just wants “fair weathered” friends?

I can’t wait to hear you all weigh in on your thoughts on how you would classify a true friend, how others have shown their friendship, or even listing the ways you feel like you could improve on being a friend.

In closing, I want to say that some of my blog readers {many whom I have never met} have been some of the sweetest friends a girl could ever ask for. Your comments, emails, words of encouragement have honestly helped me so much during this chapter of my life. I’ve learned so much from your example on how to be a friend. Thank you just doesn’t seem like enough for the things you have taught me.